It's early on a Monday morning, and I'm supping coffee in an attempt to brave the London outside. But truth is, I'm shining today.
Last night, we took the Best Drama award at Portobello Film Festival. Surreal.
When I got the email, telling me we'd been nominated, I felt sick. So to carry that lurching feeling all the way through to last night, waiting amongst the crowds as each nomination was read out, I thought I was going to throw up. But when the fest organiser, JB, announced Vinyl as the winner, I lost my shit. Arms in the air, voice at a hundred decibels, and swinging Tom around on stage, there was nothing gracious to the win. I managed to mumble some thank you's, but I know I forgot almost everybody... You see, if I had to make time to thank everyone who has shown love, support and commitment to me and my work, I'd have been there for days. But you all know who you are.
To have Tom Sawyer there with me - somebody who's been a part of my journey from day dot, it really meant everything. It's his award, Gillian's award, Luis' award, Allie's award. We baked this movie out of nothing more than a half-idea and a belly full of courage. To know adventure is to really know yourself - not enough people take themselves off on adventures anymore.
Life can become a drum cycle of work and bills, of tempered dreams and taking the safe bet. We trade so much in, and for what? Two years ago, I lost everything I had. It was half accident, followed by a deliberate destruction. At times, the secure option would have served me well. But I'm glad I rode the chaos, and I'm glad we took that chance with everything since.
If us taking a Golden Trellick at Portobello should mean anything, I hope it serves as inspiration to others to go do their thing. It'll take sacrifices you never realised existed, energy you doubted you had, and blind courage you didn't think you were capable of. But last night was validation of not just the last six months, but rather every ridiculous decision, every wild thought, and every gutsy step I've ever taken - both alone and with my friends.
This life is done before you know it - and last night, I dedicated it to a friend who's now on the other side. But because it's all over too quick, it's very necessary to own every moment and make it matter to you.
Here's to everybody who thought they could, then went out and did - it feels good to be with you.